Full Moon Healing Ceremony: Steps 9+ (2.9.17)
Preparing for the Full Moon Healing Ceremony for survivors of childhood sexual assault. Friday, February 10, 2017, 7:00 pm EST. Read previous posts for more information. Thank you Donald Trump for bringing #sexualassault to the forefront.
Below is some of my specific work. Some of it may or may not resonate with you. Ideally, write your own script. Good luck. I’m with you all the way. Crying and screaming is welcomed in this space. Tears release toxins and screams release stress.
STEP 9: Releasing
I release all lower level energies associated with being sexually abused in this lifetime and all previous lifetimes known and unknown to infinity.
I release all anger, rage, resentment, hatred, fear, sadness, illness, horror, and terror.
I release all confusion associated with this horrific abuse.
I release the power that my father (substitute your perpetrator’s name) had over me.
I release all guilt, shame, embarrassment, humiliation.
I release all traumas to my body, mind, spirit, and energy fields known and unknown.
I release any and all blocks to my growth and healing process known and unknown.
I release any and all anger towards my mother (substitute appropriate relative) for not hearing, seeing, and reacting to my cries for help.
I release any and all anger towards any and all people who crossed my paths during this traumatic period who didn’t help me for whatever reasons.
I release my anger toward God for abandoning me.
I release my anger, resentment, and despair toward religious leaders and professional counselors that turned their heads away from me when my heart and soul were aching for help, support, understanding, guidance, and compassion.
I release all anger, resentment, and despair associated with anyone else in my life that I “allowed” to abuse me because of this distorted energetic pattern in my life – this brainwashing that I experienced; this belief that I was not worthy of love and respect; this distorted, disturbing, dysfunctional expression of “love” that I experienced repeatedly as a child, teenager, and young adult.
I release this shield of protection that I created in order to survive this trauma.
I release any and all blocks to my sexuality and sensuality for what they were designed and created for – to receive love and pleasure; to share my body with whomever I want to share it with with my full and conscious consent.
I release all of my first associations of sexual experiences since they were with an inappropriate person instead of the sexual partner of my choice.
I release any and all blocks to my inner child.
I release any and all blocks to my true, authentic voice.
STEP 10: Replacing.
I replace all lower level energies with Divine white light and Love.
I replace and invite the following energies into my life: peace, love, happiness, joy, elation, creativity, spontaneity, synchronicity, bliss, music, dance, expression, art, connection, beauty, discovery, wonder, innocence, wisdom, awe, magic, sensuality, sexuality, awareness, consciousness, compassion, knowing.
STEP 11: Forgiving
I forgive my body for responding to any inappropriate sexual energy in order for me to survive this horrific experience.
I forgive my mind for creating various pathways to survive this mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual trauma.
I forgive my spirit for leaving my body in order to survive this trauma.
I forgive my father for sexually, emotionally, and psychologically abusing me.
I forgive my mother for not seeing me, hearing my cries for help, sensing something was not right in me, and for not protecting me.
I forgive my entire self.
I forgive my relatives and ancestors who created dysfunctional patterns of behavior (sexual abuse, physical abuse, emotional abuse, alcoholism, denial, etc.) that passed from generation to generation creating this inappropriate way to interact with other beings.
I forgive God.
I forgive my Methodist religion for not being what I thought that it was supposed to be in order to help me.
I forgive religious leaders and fellow Christians for not helping me.
I forgive professional counselors who were incapable of assisting me.
I forgive other people who took advantage of me when I wasn’t strong enough at times to keep the fortress up to protect myself.
STEP 12: Showing Up
Show up for this ceremony. Be fully aware, alert, and present. Everything is okay. You are safe.
STEP 13: Honoring the Child
Ask your child self at the age the abuse first began to sit beside you, hold her hand and ask, “What can I do for you? How can I help you? What do you need?” Listen.
STEP 14: Gratitude
I am thankful that I am alive.
I am thankful for my faith and belief in a Higher Power to help me even when I felt like I was abandoned.
I am thankful for my ego for helping me to survive the abuse during my high school years.
I am thankful for the television movie “Something About Amelia” starring Ted Danson that came out in 1984 to break the silence to begin discussing and healing childhood sexual abuse.
I am thankful for my inner drive, my inner compass to know that suicide, drugs, alcohol, promiscuity, and prostitution were not viable options as coping skills and avenues of escape for me.
I am thankful for my walks each day to set my inner compass and mindset for the day.
I am thankful for my parent’s love and support and for the immense good that they taught and role modeled for me.
I am thankful for my brother’s friendship, love, and support.
I am thankful for all of my friends throughout my life who have loved and supported me.
I am thankful for my husband, partner, and soul mate for his steadfast love and support and for helping me to balance myself and heal myself as we grow together.
I am thankful for my three beautiful, amazing daughters for their love, support and patience as I grow through my journey.
I am thankful for my Methodist upbringing to learn about a kind and loving God.
I am thankful for the three counselor/ministers at Virginia Institute of Pastoral Care who supported me healing my soul while also acknowledging and honoring my spiritual needs.
I am thankful for the various healers who have helped me throughout the years – massage therapists, Reike masters, acupuncturists, energy workers, chiropractors, and one alternative doctor.
I am thankful for my Cairn Terriers to provide me with unconditional love.
I am thankful for the child in me who has been speaking to me loudly and clearly for the past several years.
I am thankful for my mentors that I met through books.
I am thankful for my Guardian Angels, Goddesses, and spirit guides.
I am thankful for my ancestors.
I am grateful for healing.
I am grateful for life.
I am thankful for stories and books.
I am thankful for inspirational people.
I am thankful for art, music, and dance.
I am grateful for Mother Nature.
I am thankful for community.
I am thankful for me.
STEP 15: Celebrate
We are here. We are united. We are one.
Use your imagination. I’m planning to sing, dance, and eat delicious treats.